Calories Don't Count
I'm sure many of you have gotten those cute little food jokes regarding calories "not counting" if they are consumed in a specific way. I want to review a few of those here (author unknown) and maintain a little levity but remember these calories really do count.
Let's talk about "food on foot." Calories consumed while standing don’t count. This is especially true while we are baking cookies! Anyway the theory relates to gravity. The calories apparently bypass the stomach flowing directly down the legs and through the soles of the feet into the floor, like electricity. Walking seems to accelerate this process, so that a frozen ice cream or hot dog eaten at a theme park actually has a calorie deficit.
What about those ingredients in baking? We all know that those decadent chocolate chip cookies are fattening but what about the chocolate chips at about 50-80 calories a tablespoon? Personally I'd rather eat the cookie dough. (We might as well be eating the cookies but what is it about that darn cookie dough anyway?) However, according to unknown sources of these theories, chocolate chips eaten while making chocolate chip cookies have no calories whatsoever. I hope that applies to the cookie dough too!
Speaking of baking what about the calories on uneven pieces? Pies and cakes should be cut neatly, in even wedges or slices. If not, doesn't the responsibility fall on the person putting them away to "straighten up the edges" by slicing away the offending irregularities, which have no calories when eaten. If pie or cake is neatly cut, but the remainder is not easily divisible into equal servings, it's also permissible to even things up ... without calorie consequence of course.
Don't we all wish?
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Posted by: Elaine Murphy | Jun 23, 2008 9:23:13 PM
Hi Dharma, it's an interesting theory but I don't think it will hold. But we can all wish!
Posted by: Dharma Kelleher | Jun 23, 2008 7:54:14 PM
I've always maintained that ice cream doesn't really have calories. Please try to follow my (obviously flawed) logic.
A calorie is a unit of heat that is required to raise 1cc of water 1 degree Centigrade. Ice cream, in all its yummy goodness, is COLD. Ergo, no calories!
Of course, the C average I maintained in high school chemistry might have some relationship to the extra 60 lbs I'm carrying around my midsection.
Peace out,
Dharma Kelleher
www.dharmakelleher.com
